


The Special Days

by lildemonlili



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Baby chaeng, F/F, The good fluff, family au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-14
Updated: 2019-07-14
Packaged: 2020-06-28 04:25:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19804711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lildemonlili/pseuds/lildemonlili
Summary: How do you summarise a life? How do you decide which days mattered up until this point? How do you decide which stories to tell to the next generation? And how do you know if today will be a day to look back on, too, as something special?





	The Special Days

**Author's Note:**

> For Jud

Soft light travels through the dusty windows, and Mina makes a mental note to clean them soon, though she already knows it will probably be a while until she actually gets it done. A lot of stuff have been put aside for the moment. It’s what happens when a house fills with the sound of children’s laughter and soft taps of bare feet across the living room floor.

“Chaeng-chaeng.” Nayeon’s voice calls playfully from the kitchen.

Chaeyoung’s laughter grows and Mina looks down just in time to see the little girl before she wraps both arms around Mina’s leg, her body shaking with giggles and her cheek pressed against Mina’s thigh.

“You running from mommy?” Mina asks.

“N _ oo _ .” Chaeyoung shakes her head against Mina’s leg, her voice full of mischief.

“You shouldn’t lie, Chaengie baby.” Mina tuts, reaching down to lift the girl into her arms. Almost three years old and almost two years since she became theirs.

“Not baby. Chaengie big girl!” Chaeyoung pouts heavily as if Mina had rudely insulted her.

“Oh yeah? Then why is Chaengie baby using her baby language?” Mina softly pokes Chaeyoung’s nose just so see her scrunch it.

She doesn’t seem to have a proper response for that, and merely writhes in Mina’s arms just as Nayeon joins them.

“You’re almost done, huh?” Nayeon asks, accepting Chaeyoung the moment the little girl throws herself sideways at her mommy. Apparently she’s already forgotten who she had been running from in the first place.

Mina looks at the wall in front of them, studying the photos and nicknacks hanging from three long strings with decorative clips.

“I think so.” Mina looks over her work. “I still need to find the baby photo of Chaeng with Tim but I can’t seem to remember where I put it.”

“Isn’t it on the fridge?” Nayeon asks with a frown.

Mina takes a breath as if she’s going to say something, but the next Chaeyoung points to one of the pictures on the photowall.

“Momma who is that?”

Mina looks at the picture she’s pointing at, gently lifting her finger from the picture so she doesn’t leave a mark.

“That’s mommy and I when we were kids.” Mina explains, looking at the picture. “Actually that’s the day we met.”

Chaeyoung lowers her arm and narrows her eyes. Looks from both her parents to the picture and then back again, tucking her chin in. She obviously doesn’t believe that someone that small could be her parents.

“Do you want me to tell you the story?” Mina holds out her arms to see if Chaeyoung wants to come over to her again. Really, Nayeon ought to be working on the dinner.

“Story?” Chaeyoung asks curiously, letting Mina take her into her arms. “No cooking?”

Mina frowns. Was that what she was running from? Helping with the cooking. 

Beside Mina, Nayeon gives a little shrug. It’s fine by her.

“You going to be alone without your little helper?” Mina asks when Nayeon turns to head back into the kitchen.

“Of course.” Nayeon smiles, and there’s a domesticity in it that makes Mina melt a little. And maybe that’s why she can’t help but grab Nayeon’s wrist with her free hand and tug at it. 

Nayeon chuckles, but doesn’t resist. Instead she lets Mina pull her in for a kiss, chaste but slow.

“Ew…” Chaeyoung covers her eyes with her hands.

“It’s not  _ ew _ , Chaeng-chaeng.” Nayeon tuts, giving Mina another soft kiss, “it’s love.”

“ _ Eww!! _ ” Chaeyoung whines even so.

“Well then.” Nayeon huffs, turning to kiss Chaeyoung’s cheek, blowing a raspberry when she whines even more. She seems to resist for a few second but then she giggles, and the giggle turns into a laugh.

Nayeon draws back, looking triumphant. Mina shakes her head. How can anyone be competitive when it comes to a three year old?

“Okay, now do you want to hear the story of how Mommy and I met?” Mina asks once Chaeyoung is done wiping her cheek (dramatically).

“Mh!” Chaeyoung nods and wraps her arms around Mina’s neck, looking at the picture of the two girls in hanbok.

…

_ The sun is sharp and the air cold, and Mina blows out as hard as she can to see her breath turn white in front of her. It makes her giggle. _

_ “Minari, come!” _

_ Mina recognizes her mom’s voice amongst the noise of the many people wandering around her. Mina turns on the spot and sees an outstretched hand. In three leaps she’s reached it and feels the warmth of her mother’s hand. _

_ “Mrs Im said she would be in there.” Mina’s mom tells Mina’s dad, nodding in the direction of the market. _

_ Mina looks up at her as they walk inside. Who is that? She’s about to ask, but in the next moment the smell of meat frying on open fires distracts her. She turns her head left, right and left again to figure out where the smell comes from. It takes her a few moments to realize it’s coming from everywhere. That all the people and all the noise is because it’s a food market. Mina’s stomach growls happily in response to the smells of food mixing with each other, all the impressions making her almost dizzy. _

_ “Mommy, mommy!” Mina tugs at her mother’s hand as they pass a cart with chicken spears. “Can I have food please?” _

_ Mina’s mom looks down at her. “Later, baby, we need to find mr and mrs Im first.” _

_ “Who?” Mina tilts her head and scrunches her nose. _

_ “Mr Im is daddy’s colleague from the office, we’re meeting them here and going out to dinner with them, don’t you remember?” _

_ Mina presses her lips together and tries to remember. Then she shakes her head. “No. Mommy, I’m hungry.” _

_ Mina’s mom just smiles and makes her go along, leaving the chicken spears behind. Mina sniffles slightly, sad that she can’t have delicious food, but no more than a minute later it’s the pretty lanterns she’s sad that she can’t have. _

_ It’s not that she’s a bad child, who begs a lot. She’s not, she really isn’t. She just really likes all this stuff and it’s so new to her. She doesn’t remember when they moved here, but she was walking when they did, because she remembers playing with Ray in the cherry blossoms last spring. And if it’s new years now… no, she still doesn’t know how long ago. But Ray is bigger now, and his snout is less soft, but just as tickly as always. He’s not here though. He’s at home. Mina cried a little about that too, that he couldn’t come today. She misses him. _

_ “Look Minari.” Mina’s mom gets her attention, and Mina forgets about Ray and looks where her mommy is pointing. A family of three are huddled together between two stands, one selling fruit and the other selling ornate souvenirs. Mina’s eyes fall on the girl immediately. She’s standing with her mom’s hands on her small shoulders, and looks curiously back at Mina. _

_ “You found it.” the man of the family says casually, aimed at Mina’s dad. Mina looks up at the man. His expression is stern and his eyes don’t glint when he talks. It makes Mina look away again. _

_ “Yeah, I’m glad the wife knows how to find her way around the city or I’d be lost.” Mina’s dad jokes.  _

_ A chuckle sounds from both Mina’s mom and the girl’s. Mina blows air into her cheeks just to pass the time. _

_ “Cute…!” _

_ Mina’s cheeks deflate immediately, pinking up instead as she looks at the girl who said it. She’s smiling, and Mina notices that she’s missing both front teeth. Must be older than Mina then. She’s wearing a dress like Mina’s (Mina’s mom says it’s a korean fancy dress) and her hair is braided on either side of her face. _

_ “This is our daughter,” Mina’s mom says, noticing that the two girls have interacted, “Mina.” _

_ “What a beautiful name.” The lady holding the girl with no front teeth says. “This is Nayeon.” _

_ “Hello, Nayeon, how old are you?” Mina’s mom asks. _

_ “Six!” Nayeon holds out her hands, showing six fingers. Mina is a little jealous that she has to use two fingers to count. _

_ “How old is little Mina?” Nayeon’s mom asks, not speaking to Mina, but to her mom. _

_ “Four!” Mina blurts, forgetting her place. She holds out two fingers with each hand to show it. See? She’s not the only one who can use both hands to count. _

_ “Oh, she’s adorable.” Nayeon’s mom coos, and Mina can’t help but smile, fumbling to find her mother’s leg to hide behind it. _

_ “Now, now, Minari, baby. Why don’t you go over to Nayeon-unnie and her mom and find some food while mommy and daddy talk with mr. Im.” Mina’s mom takes Mina’s arms gently away from her leg and crouches down. _

_ Mina shakes her head. She wants to stay, and emphasizes it by lifting her arms, asking her mom to carry her. _

_ “No, Mina. Look, see, Nayeon wants to talk to you.” Mina’s mom gestures to Nayeon and Mina sees that she has a hand outstretched. _

_ Mina eyes it. One can never be too careful after all. _

_ “It’s okay, Minari. Go with Nayeon and her mom.” Mina’s mom says again. And this time Mina listens. Carefully, she walks away from her mom, towards Nayeon whose hand is still outstretched. It’s warm when Mina takes it, and bigger than her own, so she only grabs three of the older girl’s fingers. The girl smiles at her, revealing her missing front teeth. There’s a tiny white line in the gum on one side, revealing that they’re growing out. Mina wonders if it hurts, but then the girl closes her mouth and Mina forgets. _

_ “I like your hairpin.” Nayeon says. _

_ Mina shyly touches the little bunny pin in her hair. But she doesn’t answer. Nayeon doesn’t seem to mind though. _

_ “Do you want to get food, Mina-ya?” Nayeon’s mom asks. _

_ Mina looks up at her and nods. Her stomach rumbles in applause and she blushes when Nayeon’s mom laughs at the sound. Nayeon holds her hand a little tighter and then seals her lips real tight and makes a noise in her throat like a rumble. _

_ “Two hungry little girls, huh? Better get you something to eat.” Nayeon’s mom tuts. _

_ Nayeon grins down at Mina, and Mina holds on tight as they walk. She wants to be with her forever. _

…

“Did you really know back then, that you wanted to be with me forever?” Nayeon asks, emerging from the kitchen with half a carton of milk. The apron is dirty with flour.

Mina chuckles, fiddling with little Chaeyoung’s hands. She’s been listening so well, even if the majority of the story wasn’t even Mina’s. She barely remembers, but Mina’s and Nayeon’s parents have filled in the gaps well. After all, Mina was only four.

“You defended my rumbling tummy and you held my hand, of course I wanted to be with you forever.” Mina says.

It’s not a lie. At four years old she really did feel like that. But that’s probably most four year olds who finds someone they like. They somehow become best friends in minutes. It takes nothing, and there’s no ill intentions to anything. It’s just chemistry. And Mina wanted to spend every day with Nayeon. At least that’s what her mom says.

“Well I don’t mind, you were the cutest thing I had ever seen.” Nayeon smiles, taking a little flour from her apron and spreading it across Chaeyoung’s cheeks. 

Chaeyoung grumbles in protest.

“This way it looks like you actually did help me in the kitchen like you promised.” Nayeon tuts.

Chaeyoung looks deeply offended and wipes the flour in her sleeve. 

Nayeon gapes.

It makes Chaeyoung smile in that way that shows her dimples.

“You sneaky little devil, come here you.” Nayeon says, lifting Chaeyoung into her arms.

“In over your head?” Mina asks with a cocked eyebrow. It’s not usually Nayeon who’s in the kitchen and there’s a reason for it. But she had insisted on impressing them with her baking skills. Something special for a special day, Nayeon had insisted.

“Lil’ bit.” Nayeon cringes.

“I got it.” Mina shakes her head and walks past them, discreetly tapping her wife’s butt on the way out. Just to make sure she knows Nayeon owes her.

She hears how Nayeon starts telling another story, this time pointing to the picture of Nayeon and Mina at sports day.

…

_ “Run, Mina!” Nayeon shouts as loud as she can (which is really loud). _

_ The crowd around her cheer as well, though not just for Mina. All the girls in the race are doing their best, and Mina is so close to stealing third. _

_ “Come on, Mina!” Nayeon’s voice almost cracks, her stomach in a knot so tight she might cry. There’s nothing she wants more than for Mina to win this. She bounces a little on the spot to get some of the energy out, and she feels her own medal jump against her chest. She’s already done with all her challenges. It’s only Mina left now. _

_ Mina grits her teeth and sets an impossible pace for her still short legs, and Nayeon can almost feel the strain on Mina’s lungs as if they were her own. Maybe Mina hears her. Nayeon likes to think she does.  _

_ “Go!! Mina, go!” Nayeon feels almost too overwhelmed. Never had she imagined that she could get so emotional over a race during the school’s sports day. But it’s Mina. Little invisible, hardworking Mina. Nayeon’s Mina. And she wants to win. She told Nayeon earlier today, and Nayeon promised her that if she wanted to, then she could. _

_ And then it happens. _

_ Someone gets up behind Nayeon, pushing her in the back with an elbow. It sends her forwards, and she tries to fend off the fall with her hands, but one of them hits the edge of a relay baton, and slips at a weird angle. The sound of a crack precedes a sharp pain, and Nayeon’s eyes spill over immediately as she rolls onto her side, clutching arm. Everything is pain and cheering and confusion, but she can’t see. _

_ “Hey, kid! Kid, are you okay?” Someone asks from above her. A man’s voice. _

_ She shakes her head and whimpers. It hurts so much. _

_ “Kid, can you get up?” _

_ Nayeon shakes her head, a sob slipping past her lips. She wants her mom. Can’t someone get her mom? _

_ “Hey, nurse?! Nurse, there’s a kid here, she fell, I think!” The man calls. _

_ “No dude, you pushed her.” Another man says, his voice not nearly as deep. _

_ Nayeon cries, eyes shut tight though the sunshine tries to make its way through them. _

_ “Nayeon-unnie?!” _

_ The voice makes Nayeon open her eyes and move her head in the direction of the sound. It makes her arm move and pain shoots through her wrist again. But there’s Mina, running towards her, red faced and with worry in her big eyes. And then she’s by Nayeon’s side, throwing herself down on her knees next to Nayeon’s head. Nayeon notices how Mina winces, but grits her teeth. _

_ “What happened?” Mina asks, reaching for Nayeon’s wrist but not touching. She looks distraught. _

_ “I don’t know, it hurts.” Nayeon feels slightly embarrassed, but she can’t stop herself from crying. _

_ Then someone else sits down next to her, and she looks up into a woman’s kind face at the same time as she feels a hand in her hair. Mina. _

_ “I’m a nurse, can you tell me your name?” _

_ “Im Nayeon.” Mina says before Nayeon can. _

_ The nurse nods.  _

_ “Nayeon, I’m going to take a look at your wrist, and it’s going to hurt, but it’s necessary, okay?” _

_ Nayeon whimpers and shakes her head. She doesn’t want anyone to touch it. It hurts so much. But then Mina’s hand is gone from her hair and finds her non-injured hand, holding it tight between her own little ones. _

_ Nayeon smiles at her. But only for a second. Because the next she’s crying in pain as the nurse holds her wrist, examining it. _

_ “Talk to her.” the nurse says, aimed at Mina. _

_ Mina nods. “Unnie, I won. I heard you yelling for me and I won.” _

_ Nayeon grasps harder around Mina’s hand, the pain making her heart race faster than it ever has. But Mina is there. _

_ “I’m glad.” Nayeon whimpers. “Did- did you get… your medal?” _

_ Mina shakes her head. “Not yet. I just finished when I saw you, and I came right over. I was looking for you when I won, and I couldn’t see you.” _

_ “I’m ouch- I’m sorry.”  _

_ Mina smiles. “It’s okay. I knew you didn’t leave. You wouldn’t do that.” _

_ Nayeon chuckles. Mina has always had blind faith in Nayeon. She has always trusted Nayeon with her entire heart. _

_ “Nayeon?” The nurse is still holding Nayeon’s wrist. “Your wrist is sprained. That means it’s not broken, but you will need to put ice on it and we will wrap bandages around it. Can you hold it like this over your heart until I come back with the ice and first aid kit?” _

_ Nayeon nods and sniffles. Then winces when the nurse lets go of her wrist. But she does as the doctor says, still lying on the ground with Mina’s hands around her good one and the other now over her heart.  _

_ She still wants her mom, but she knows she’ll be okay as long as she has Mina there.  _

_ “I’m sorry I didn’t see you win, Mina-ya.” Nayeon says. She’s still crying, though she doesn’t want to. It’s just so hard to stop, when she can feel the tears on her cheeks, running down her temple and around the shells of her ears. It itches a little. But she doesn’t want to take her hand away from Mina’s. So she just shuffles a little to try and relieve the itch. _

_ “What’s wrong?” Mina asks. _

_ Nayeon shakes her head. It’s nothing. _

_ Mina doesn’t seem to believe her, a deducing look on her face. Then she notices the tear trails, and seems to make a conclusion. With one hand she holds on to Nayeon’s hand, and with the other she starts wiping the salty tears from Nayeon’s face, gently trying to get it all away. _

_ Nayeon feels dumb, but thankful. If she just hadn’t tripped. Or hadn’t cried. But Mina doesn’t seem to mind. She even holds Nayeon’s hand the entire half hour it takes to wrap and ice Nayeon’s hand, missing her own ceremony. Someone brings over the medal however, and Nayeon reaches up to clumsily get it over Mina’s head with one hand.  _

_ It’s this day Nayeon realizes she doesn’t know how to imagine a world without Mina. That no matter where she goes from here, every single future has Mina in it. _

…

“You know, I still have the medal somewhere.” Mina notes from the kitchen.

Nayeon chuckles, sitting at the coffee table with Chaeyoung. Chaeyoung isn’t sitting at the table however, but on it. She got bored sitting on Nayeon’s arm halfway through, and Nayeon fetched paper and crayons, to let Chaeyoung draw while Nayeon told the story.

It’s not really clear to Nayeon what the doodles are supposed to be, but Chaeyoung seems very passionate about them, so it must be important.

“Are you done, baby?” Nayeon asks when Chaeyoung puts the yellow crayon down with much determination.

“Not quite yet, but I’m making frosting.” a voice says behind Nayeon, and it makes her shiver and turn her head just in time to see Mina stand with a spoonful of frosting.

“I was talking to the actual baby, Minari.” Nayeon tuts taking the spoon.

“Not a baby!” Chaeyoung says in her baby voice, pointing at herself. “I’m a big girl!”

“Yes you are, big girl. You’re a very big girl, and you’re so good at drawing too.” Mina coos, stealing the spoon from Nayeon and offering it to Chaeyoung instead. Chaeyoung grins so wide it makes her dimple show and she chomps down on the spoon happily.

“Hey, that was for me.” Nayeon whines.

“No it wasn’t.” Mina giggles. 

Nayeon sulks and watches as Chaeyoung tries to tell Mina what’s on the drawing while keeping the spoon in her mouth.

“S’a metal!” Chaeyoung points at what Nayeon would’ve guessed to be the sun.

“A medal?” Mina asks. “Like my gold medal?”

Chaeyoung nods enthusiastically, the spoon comically sitting in her mouth.

Nayeon still feels a little betrayed at the lack of frosting, but mostly just impressed that Chaeyoung has been drawing the story.

“Is that a hand?” Mina asks, pointing at a brown blob.

Chaeyoung nods once more, but then seems to have made herself dizzy. She sways slightly. Mina grabs around her waist to steady her, obviously amused by the little girl sitting on the coffee table.

Then Chaeyoung takes out the spoon, licked free of frosting, and with the other hand takes the drawing, holding it out to Nayeon.

“For you, mommy.” 

Affection surges through Nayeon at her daughter’s gesture, and she takes the picture. Then Chaeyoung looks up at Mina. “A more story.”

Mina looks over at Nayeon. “Is that okay with you? Just take out the cake in three minutes and let it cool, and then wash and cut the fruit for decoration.”

Nayeon shrugs. “I think I can manage that.”

“And don’t eat all the frosting.” Mina raises an eyebrow.

Nayeon holds up both hands in defense. “I wouldn’t dream of it!”

“Yes you would.” Mina says dryly, tugging at Nayeon’s wrist. 

Nayeon doesn’t resist the least, but lets Mina pull her in for a kiss, though not as chaste as the last one. Once more Chaeyoung covers her eyes and whines, this time kicking her feet against the coffee table in embarrassment. But Mina just kisses Nayeon firmly, and Nayeon tastes why.

“Buttercream?” Nayeon draws back with a grin.

Mina shrugs and waves her off, turning to their embarrassed daughter instead. “Okay Chaengie baby, do you want to help momma get the picture for the next story?”

Chaeyoung nods, glowering after Nayeon as if it’s Nayeon’s fault that she’s embarrassed. But Nayeon just sticks out her tongue at her daughter and disappears into the kitchen while her wife picks up their daughter, taking her over to the newly finished memory wall.

“That one!” Nayeon hears Chaeyoung say.

“Oh yeah?” Mina chuckles “Well that one is a little embarrassing for you to hear, it involves kissing.”

“ _ Ew! _ ” Chaeyoung whines.

Nayeon smiles, looking into the bowl of buttercream frosting. It really is very good.

…

_ Mina can’t stop staring at her. It’s a day Mina has looked forward to for two years, for them to finally go to the same school again, for Mina to finally go to high school. And they’re finally here, but Mina can’t stop staring. _

_ “Oh come on.” Nayeon tuts, nudging Mina. _

_ Mina jolts and looks down at the ground. “I just don’t get why you did it.” _

_ “Why shouldn’t I?” Nayeon asks. “It’s cute.” _

_ Mina looks up. She feels so awkward. The clothes don’t look right and she shouldn’t have cut her hair like she did. Nayeon pulls off the red uniform so effortlessly, always looks so natural. And Mina is just… Mina. _

_ Nayeon gives a little tired sigh and takes out the little blue bunny pin that has been the cause of Mina’s staring. “Would you rather I didn’t wear it?” _

_ Mina presses her lips hard together. Then shakes her head a little. It’s not that. It’s just embarrassing. It’s Mina’s pin, and Nayeon put it on, this morning when picking up Mina from her house. _

_ Nayeon puts the pin back in her hair. “I like it. It reminds me of you.” _

_ Mina looks up at her so fast she almost misses a step. Nayeon grins at her and links their arms. They’re almost at the school now. _

_ “Won’t your friends think it’s childish?” Mina asks. _

_ Nayeon shrugs in a nonchalant manner. “So what if they do? That’s their problem. This way I get to have you with me in classes even when we’re in different years.” _

_ Mina blushes. Nayeon always says cheesy stuff like that, but recently Mina has gotten an increasing urge to get her to stop. It makes Mina feel so weird inside - as if someone is tickling her without touching her. _

_ “I just don’t want people to think you’re weird because of me.” Mina admits. Nayeon’s hand tightens on her arm and Mina bites the inside of her cheeks. _

_ “Trust me, it’ll be fine.” Nayeon says it in a way that Mina can do nothing but nod and follow her friend. “It’s going to be an amazing year Minari.” _

_ “How so?” Mina asks carefully. _

_ “Because we have an entire year together! An entire year!” Nayeon grins at her, repeatedly tugging at Mina’s arm, making it hard to walk right. But Mina doesn’t mind. She just giggles at Nayeon and nods. _

_ “I guess you’re right.” Mina says quietly. _

_ “You guess? Aren’t you excited?” There’s something in Nayeon’s voice this time. A genuine concern. It makes Mina look around at her. _

_ “Of course. I just-” Mina clears her throat. “I’m so nervous.” _

_ “No shit, Sherlock.” Nayeon chuckles. _

_ “I don’t want them to think I’m weird. I- I was at this place with some of the girls from my old class a few weeks ago. I don’t know why they invited me, I think Jihyo made them. But they were all talking about how high school would be and what you’re supposed to do in high school or before high school, and I don’t want to do any of those things.” _

_ “Romance things?” Nayeon guesses. _

_ Mina nods. It’s not really hard to figure out that it was this Mina was talking about. In terms of the rites that come with moving up to high school, it’s really only boys that seem to be rules about. One of the girls said she had already kissed a boy. Another said she wanted to wait until at least second year. Jihyo just laughed at them both and called them boycrazy. And Mina had sat there, realizing she hadn’t ever considered that boys were for kissing. _

_ “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.” Nayeon says. _

_ “What if I never want to?” Mina asks in the smallest voice she’s ever used. _

_ “Huh?” Nayeon stops. “Sorry, I didn’t hear.” _

_ Mina considers backing out. She could. Nayeon usually accepts it when she just shakes her head and smiles and says ‘nevermind’. But maybe it’s the bunny pin or the way Nayeon looks at her. But she repeats herself, a little louder this time. _

_ “What if I never want to?” _

_ Nayeon seems lost for a moment. “What do you mean? Go on dates?” _

_ Mina shakes her head. “Boys.” _

_ Nayeon looks mostly like she’s trying to connect two plugs that are identical instead of opposite. And it makes sense. How could she not connect boys and dating? It was natural. But then Nayeon seems to connect the dots. _

_ “Well that’s okay too.” _

_ Mina opens her mouth but immediately closes it again. What is she even thinking? There’s no way. Why would Nayeon ever- why is she even considering- it’s not like she likes her or anything. They’re friends. But then Nayeon speaks and it makes Mina’s stomach backflip. _

_ “You know, I think you’d be someone good to date. I wouldn’t mind it at all.” _

_ Mina’s cheeks feel immediately too hot, and she wants to run. This wasn’t the intention. She hadn’t meant to drive the conversation in this direction. And she knows Nayeon can see the flushed cheeks. She knows Nayeon is aware of Mina’s reaction. _

_ “Mina?” _

_ There’s a split second where Mina considers running for real. Instead, she shakes her head and gives a nervous smile. It’s the best she can manage. “You’re right, it’s not a cause for worry.” _

_ The nod from Nayeon is slow and calculating, but the soft smile that follows is genuine and wonderful. _

_ “Let’s make a deal.” _

_ “Deal?” Mina’s heart races without really knowing why.  _

_ “If you haven’t had a kiss by the end of the year, you can have one from me.” _

_ Something inside Mina’s brain, some wheel or a knob, falls off the hinge. Makes everything else turn off. It’s so loud that she’s sure Nayeon must be able to hear this complete factory shut down inside Mina’s head. Kissing Nayeon. _

_ “Or you know, any time you want, really. You don’t have to wait. And you don’t have to kiss me at all.” Nayeon’s sentences pick up pace, and she fiddles with the bunny pin. Unfastens and then fastens it again, until it catches her hair wrong and she winces. Mina’s reaction is instinctive, and though her mind and face are blank, her fingers reach for the pin, swatting Nayeon’s hands away. She fixes it. Lingers. And then surfaces. _

_ She’s supposed to say something. She is. Because her oldest friend just suggested they kiss. As if it wasn’t a big deal. But at the same time, her cheeks… they’re red like Mina’s. _

_ “End of the year.” Mina finally whispers. _

_ There’s a fraction of a second where Nayeon looks almost disappointed. But then she nods, sending Mina her best toothy grin. “You’ll be my graduation present then.” _

_ Mina doesn’t know what to say. But it’s okay, because Nayeon’s arm links with hers once more, and she’s walking them around the corner, towards the school. Her eyes glint and her smile lingers, but Mina sees her cheeks, pink and warm. Notices how her eyes are decidedly looking ahead. How her smile is just a little unsure. _

_ Mina isn’t aware what she’s doing until she’s done it. But her lips feel a hint of warmth as they peck Nayeon’s cheek with no warning of forethought. _

_ Nayeon looks around at her. But Mina just looks ahead. It’s hard not to smile. But it’s harder not to fall. Impossible even. _

…

Chaeyoung sits on Mina’s hip with a drawing in her hand. It has a single red blob on it, which Mina knows to be a heart. She knows because halfway through the story, right after finishing the drawing of the heart, the little girl had reached up and touched Mina’s chest, her mouth falling slightly open at the feeling of a heartbeat underneath the little palm. After that Chaeyoung had moved closer until she could lean on Mina, leaving the drawing behind. Instead she listened to Mina’s story with her ear against Mina’s heart. And now they were here, in the kitchen with the somehow finished cake and Chaeyoung handing over the drawing to Nayeon.

“What’s this?” Nayeon asks curiously, turning the paper to see if she can figure it out.

“Momma’s heart.” Chaeyoung says happily, pushing her ear against Mina’s chest.

“You’re giving me momma’s heart?” Nayeon asks, her voice slightly breathless.

“Mh.” Chaeyoung confirms.

Mina hugs the girl closer, feeling the urge to relieve the tension of the situation somehow. But Nayeon just walks past them with the drawing, and Mina walks after her, watching as Nayeon grabs white tack from the set of materials Mina had used for the memory wall. Nayeon turns the drawing upside down lip tucked between her teeth as she attaches little pieces of white tack to each corner. Then she turns it around again, turns the paper ninety degrees and then another ninety after a little consideration. 

“This is up?” Nayeon asks just to be sure.

Chaeyoung nods theatrically and Mina rubs over her back.

Nayeon on the other hand just walks over to Mina’s perfectly planned and symmetrical memory wall. 

“Nayeon?” Mina asks worriedly. But Nayeon doesn’t answer. She just sends Mina a grin and then puts up the drawing right under the three lines of string. It’s not even. It’s not aligned. And it completely ruins Mina’s perfect plan. But Mina loves it like that. Because it’s everything Nayeon is. 

“You ready for the cake now?” Mina asks with a tilt of the head.

Nayeon nods. “How about the baby? She looks tired.” there’s a slight teasing note in Nayeon’s voice. “Maybe we should skip the cake and just put her to bed.”

“I’m  _ not _ tired!” Chaeyoung mopes. “I want cake!”

“Are you sure? Baby you look so tired.” Nayeon’s teasing grows rapidly obvious.

“I want cake! And I’m not a baby.” Chaeyoung clings to Mina and kicks her legs slightly, obviously worried that Nayeon’s now outstretched arms mean that she really won’t get cake. She whines when Nayeon comes too close, and that becomes Mina’s clue.

“Hey Chaeng, how about we steal the cake and mommy doesn’t get any.”

“You wouldn’t.” Nayeon gapes.

“You’re threatening our daughter after she helped make the cake.” Mina counters theatrically, feeling Chaeyoung grow at her side from having someone on her side.

“She barely helped!” Nayeon whines. “She ran away from me after cracking one egg!”

“Isn’t that flour on her shirt? I think we know the flour means she did much more than just crack an egg, isn’t that right Chaeyoungie?” Mina loves the indignation in Nayeon’s eyes at having the joke backfire. 

“S’right!” Chaeyoung chimes victoriously.

“The nerve…” Nayeon grumbles. “You’re so lucky you’re cute.”

“We know.” Chaeyoung and Mina say together, making both of them giggle.

Nayeon smiles at them and shakes her head. “You got so confident after we married Minari. It’s hard to keep up with you. Especially with a devil on your arm.”

“Oh please, she’s an angel.” Mina kisses Chaeyoung’s forehead, seeing Nayeon pout. She really has two babies sometimes. But it’s good that they’re both easily managed with the right amount of kisses. Even if she simply opts for holding Nayeon’s hand this time, pulling her into the kitchen. 

“If you grab the cake, I’ll take the cutter and plates.” Mina says.

Nayeon does as told, taking the now finished cake and carrying it into the living room, setting it on their dining table. Mina follows, Chaeyoung holding the spoons and Mina holding the rest.

“Happy anniversary, love.” Mina says when they’re finally seated around the table, Chaeyoung in her high chair and Mina and Nayeon on either side of her.

“Anniva-ve-versary?” Chaeyoung’s tongue ties around the word but she manages it in the end.

“Yeah, it’s our anniversary today.” Nayeon says, stroking over Chaeyoung’s thick black hair.

“What’s that?” Chaeyoung asks. “Like a birthday?”

Nayeon purses her lips. “Well… Kind of.”

And then she tells the last story.

…

_ “Did you get any sleep last night?” Mina asks, her voice groggy and apologetic over the sound of the crying baby. She’s gently rocking Chaeyoung in her arms, but it doesn’t help much. It never does. _

_ Nayeon shakes her head, unable to answer with words. She might cry if she does. Instead, she rubs her eyes as she would if she was tired - just to hide the tears of exhaustion that keep glazing over her eyes. _

_ “I’m sorry.” Mina sniffles, kissing the baby’s forehead, shushing her. “I’m so sorry.” _

_ Nayeon knows Mina is apologizing to both of them. For not being able to take Chaeyoung’s pain away. _

_ “It’s not your fault she has colic.” Nayeon mutters quietly. It’s all she can do. _

_ “I know. But I could’ve let someone else take her. I’m the one who brought her home. It’s my fault you’re this exhausted.” Mina’s voice cracks, and Nayeon looks up at her with a sigh. They can’t run from that truth. _

_ “I said it was okay, though.” Nayeon tries. But it doesn’t change reality. _

_ Mina had barely started her intern year when a colicy baby had been abandoned at the hospital, with no way of finding the parents. Mina had been the one to help care for her and treat her before handing her over to the authorities, but during this time, Mina had grown so attached to the baby that she had pleaded Nayeon for them to take the baby in until her permanent family could be found. And Nayeon couldn’t deny her the wish. If nothing else, it would be good training for when they decided to have a kid on their own. And so, when the time came, Mina had asked the authorities to let them take the baby whom they had nicknamed Chaeyoung, and despite the registration or training however, they had been granted temporary guardianship over little baby Chaeyoung.  _

_ That was four months ago. _

_ “I didn’t know it would be this hard, Nayeon.” Mina whispers, still shushing the whimpering Chaeyoung. She is finally calming down a little. _

_ Nayeon’s stomach turns at the thought. She loves Chaeyoung so much. But she is not ready to be a mom yet. She’s just not. And they had done good by her. She would get a family soon, and she would maybe even have siblings. Maybe a dog. Parents. A better parent than Nayeon. Someone who was ready for her. Someone who had waited for her always. _

_ “I just wish we had the energy to celebrate a little today.” Mina finally sits down next to Nayeon, as Chaeyoung’s whimpers turn to sighs. She had eaten a few hours ago, and it seems her stomach is finally settled enough. Chaeyoung barely did anything except sleep and eat when her colic was bad.  _

_ This week has been… bad. Really bad. _

_ “It’s okay. We’ll just play stupid and pretend it’s tomorrow.” Nayeon says, wrapping an arm around her tired wife and looking at Chaeyoung. She’s barely six months old, and has already had two homes. All Nayeon can hope for now, is that the third might be her permanent home. _

_ “It’s our wedding anniversary, Nayeon. That doesn’t just… move.” _

_ “We got married in a courthouse, because of your loans, Minari. It could’ve been any day.” _

_ “We got married because we love each other.” Mina sounds hurt.  _

_ Nayeon feels the guilt immediately. “I know. Then maybe let’s just celebrate it here, at home? We can do a double celebration next year.” _

_ There’s an implicit indication of ‘when we’re alone’ and Mina obviously senses it. _

_ “I don’t know if I can give her up.” Mina admits with a shiver in her voice. “I don’t think I can do this much longer, but I don’t think I can give her up either.” _

_ Nayeon swallows. She knows how attached Mina is to the little girl. It was love at first sight. This girl is the only one Mina has ever loved as much as she loves Nayeon. But Nayeon isn’t ready. She holds such a love for this little girl and impossibly more love for how Mina loves her. But she’s not a mom. And Mina is still just an intern with insane hours at the hospital and she’s barely twenty four years old for god’s sake. They’re not ready. Who can expect them to be ready for this? For the complete lack of sleep and the almost constant crying, feeding and changing every three to four hours, for the exhaustion so bad that they can barely hold themselves together. But they have to. For Chaeyoung. Because right now they’re all she has.  _

_ “Maybe you should get a few hours now that she is calm.” Nayeon suggests,watching how Chaeyoung’s little mouth falls open with a soft pop as she falls asleep. _

_ Mina nods and looks down at the baby in her arms. Her voice is but a whimper when she speaks. “I’m so tired.” _

_ “I know, baby.” Nayeon kisses Mina’s temple with an exertion of energy she didn’t know she had. As if she’s somehow capable of keeping it together, because Mina needs her to. “I know. Come on, let me take her and you lie down, just here. I’ll wake you before you have to get ready.” _

_ Nayeon softly reaches for the sleeping baby, and Mina lets her take Chaeyoung, settling the little thing in one arm. With her free hand, Nayeon tugs at Mina, making her lie with her head in Nayeon’s lap. _

_ “Just sleep. I got you.” Nayeon hushes, as Mina curls up on the couch. Nayeon adjusts slightly, letting her arm holding Chaeyoung rest on a pillow. Then she threads her fingers through Mina’s hair. She sings for both of them. For her girls. Despite how hard it is, despite her urge to follow them into whichever dream, she sings; keeps watch at the gates while they rest vulnerably in the safety of her. _

_ It’s a responsibility like none other Nayeon has ever come across.  _

_ At least until the phone lights up with a silent call from Mina’s phone. It’s lying on the coffee table, and Nayeon considers letting it go to voicemail. She really does. But the number is for Chaeyoung’s social worker. _

_ “Hello?” Nayeon says as quietly as she can. The engagement ring on her finger sparkles right next to the gold wedding ring.  _

“Miss Myoui?”

_ “No, this is Im Nayeon, Mina can’t come to the phone right now.” Nayeon mutters. She prays more than anything that they won’t wake up. Neither of them. _

“Oh, well this concerns you as well I guess so if it’s the same to you?”

_ “Sure?” Nayeon says it as neutrally as she can. She’s fearful. Four months is a long time without permanent placement for an almost perfectly healthy baby girl. _

“I need to inform you that the case of claimed abandonment has passed, meaning that the child-“

_ “Chaeyoung. Her name is Chaeyoung.” Nayeon looks down at the child. Her lips move slightly in her sleep, and Nayeon wonders if she might be hungry again soon. _

“- Yes, Chaeyoung.”  _ The social worker continues,  _ “This means that she’s now a legal orphan and can be adopted, not just fostered.”

_ “Oh, that’s a relief.” Nayeon says, mostly because it’s what she’s been taught to say. It’s the best possible situation for Chaeyoung, even if it will hurt to give her up. _

“We will of course run the adoption case, try to find her a family as soon as possible.”

_ “How soon?” _

“Hopefully within two months.”

_ “Two months?” Nayeon can’t take her eyes off Chaeyoung. The tears stain her cheeks before she realizes it. Two months… _

“We know it’s hard to keep the baby with her condition but we want to request that she stay with you until she’s adopted, for the sake of stability. It’s okay for you to back out, of course, and alternative foster placement will of course be possible until then, if that’s what you want.”

_ “No.” Nayeon shakes her head. She’s not ready. “No that’s not what I want.” _

_ The social worker takes a breath, possibly to find an appropriate reaction. Nayeon knows the tears are audible in her voice. But the next moment Nayeon jolts. A hand cups her cheek, and she looks away from Chaeyoung, to Mina who’s looking up at her with worried, open eyes. Nayeon doesn’t know what to say, so she just leans into Mina’s hand and mouths an  _ ‘I love you’ _. _

“I want to inform you,”  _ the social worker brings Nayeon back to reality,  _ “that if you wished to apply for permanent legal guardianship over Chaeyoung, you would of course be given a certain a preferential treatment over other applicants, as you’re already her temporary guardians.”

_ Nayeon can barely breathe. “Adopt her?” _

_ She can feel Mina’s hand shake and looking down she finds her eyes spilling over. But she doesn’t move. Doesn’t speak. Just lays in Nayeon’s lap with eyes that speak a truth Nayeon already knows. Mina wants to. She wants this kid, but she also knows. Knows that Nayeon is not ready. That she never wanted this kid. Never asked for any of it. And Mina’s tear-stained cheeks are telling her that it’s okay if they let go. It’s okay that Nayeon isn’t ready.  _

_ They can wait and have a baby of their own some day.  _

“I understand that it’s a lot to consider and please feel free to-“

_ “No.” Nayeon’s voice shakes. But her hand around Chaeyoung’s little leg as she rests in Nayeon’s arm and Mina’s disbelieving, hopeful eyes, makes everything make sense. Her eyes are locked with Mina’s with every word she says, the constant confirmation making her brave. _

_ “She’s ours. Please, let us keep her. Don’t take her away from us. We’re her parents.” _


End file.
